I’ve waited almost two years to make this entry. First because I was not sure what the outcome would be. Then because I didn’t want to accept the outcome and then because it made me sad and I just didn’t want to do it. It still makes me sad to write this very long entry but good news follows, so it is easier.

Long story short: I went home. Healed. Lived to try again.

My last day as a thru hiker ended in tears but also so much relief. I started hiking slowly and carefully. My knee and Achilles tendon were still visibly swollen and they HURT. I started early because I knew I was going to be slow and I wanted to camp near the shelter, so I had about an 8 mile hike planned. T

The trail was easier than I anticipated and I arrived at the shelter around lunch time. It was only about a mile into town and I decided that it would be just as easy to hike another mile as it would be to set up camp – especially so early in the day. Hiking a mile meant I could sleep in a bed (I love my hammock, but ahh a bed); eat a hot meal (not just a hot meal created by rehydrating a freeze dried concoction, but a restaurant meal); and take a hot shower (this is really the one that made me decide to keep going – nothing, absolutely nothing, feels as good as taking a hot shower and being clean when you are tired, sore, and smelly).

I ate my snack, took some meds and off I went for one last mile into town. I hurt as I was walking. I stiffened up sitting at the shelter so I started slooow. When you are alone in the woods, you can either be very zen like or your brain can be spinning like a whirlwind from topic to topic. Both are good and fun in their own way. What is not fun is when your brain has this on repeat: OUCH! THAT HURTS! YOU ARE AN IDIOT! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS! IT HURTS! Not a fun way to go about your day.

The final blow was when I lost my footing on a rock and wrenched my knee and sore leg again. I just sat down in the middle of the trail and cried. My leg hurt. No one was coming to my rescue and I truly just didn’t want to be there anymore. I called a friend to get some advice and the advice was: if you are sure you don’t want to be there – 100% sure, then come home.

I was 100% sure I wanted to be home and off the trail until I was healed. I was also 100% sure I wasn’t going to change my mind while my knee was so swollen and painful that I could feel my pulse in it. The one thing I was wrong about was: no one would come rescue me!

I reached out to a local shuttle driver and trail angel and asked if she could pick me up the road junction. I explained my situation and she said that not only would she pick me up but she knew the local Trail Runner and would have him come to me to help me to the road and that is what happened! I sat for about 40 minutes. A Trail Runner ran up the trail to me and carried my pack down to the road (almost a mile) while I hobbled along behind him. It was much easier to hobble along without my pack. He wasn’t a big burly fireman with a palanquin.He was better because he was real and he got me down the mountain!

Once safely down my rescue team took me to lunch and talked about what I wanted to do next. Once I told them I wanted to go home, I was offered a ride to the airport, a place to stay, and anything else I needed. I ended up getting a ride to the nearest airport. I bought a ticket to DFW for the next day on the drive down, booked a hotel for the night and found a place that would deliver pizza once I got into my room. In the space of two hours I went from sitting in the middle of the trail crying, to checking into my hotel.

The relief at knowing I was not going to walk 8-10 miles on a swollen knee and Achilles tendon was almost enough to make me cry all over again. Making the decision to leave the trail AGAIN was overwhelming but also absolutely the right thing to do. I was injured (luckily not seriously or permanently) and continuing on was only going to do more damage to my body plus it just wasn’t fun anymore.

I limped my way home sad and sore. Set up a series of doctors appointments. Made sure I hadn’t done any permanent damage to anything. My Achilles was sore and strained but the tear was not bigger. My knee was sprained and I had a pulled muscle in my inner thigh. All required rest and time to heal. Then life happened and I started making plans while I was healing. Then I started making plans into the fall. I did heal, very slowly, but I never got it together to go back in the trail. Finally I had to admit that I wasn’t going to be a true Thru Hiker. So I promised myself that while I didn’t hike the entire trail in one season I could still hike the entire trail eventually (for a recovering Tupe A Personality this is a momentous decision).

So the story of how I finally managed to hike out of Pennsylvania is next!